Boundaries
Tomorrow we have a full day, because we have an symposium!
“The Unsuccess Symposium: Let Us Get Successful So We Can Stop Giving a Shit About Getting Successful,” the line-up is …
Getting Things Done in 2021 w/ David Allen. December 22nd @ 10:00 AM ET. RSVP here.
Complice: Beyond Getting Things Done w/ Malcolm Ocean. December 22nd @ 11:00 AM ET. RSVP here.
Philosophy of Success w/ Tom Butler-Bowdon. December 22nd @ 12:00 PM ET. 2020. RSVP here.
Ultraworking Ethos w/ Sebastian Marshall. December 22nd @ 2:00 PM ET. RSVP here.
Procrastination is The New Normal w/ Piers Steel. December 22nd @ 3:00 PM ET. RSVP here.
Not So Secret: The Law of Attraction, Positive Thinking, and the New Thought Movement w/ Mitch Horowitz. December 22nd @ 6:00 PM ET. RSVP here.
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December 21st, 2020
I sense some people are not going to be happy with my decision to (maybe) end The Stoa, and my decision to delete the Discord, which I also recently decided upon. I did wake up this morning wanting to write about the Unsuccess Symposium that is happening tomorrow, but feeling into the energy of the Discord, my mind has turned towards it.
I was told previously that I was perhaps an “empath,” which is the term used for people who can quickly pick up, and take on, the emotional states of others. I can feel others' emotions pretty well. I can feel an entire group's emotional field actually, or at least I think that is what is happening when I am in a group. Perhaps that is why I am often told I am good at holding space.
I do not know if my capacities here qualify me as an empath. I do often get drained from feeling all these emotional states though, and at times it feels overwhelming. Is this a surprise? I am a Stoic, and Stoics are these guys with no feelings after all, right? No. Maybe this is why I got into Stoicism in the first place, to get a handle on catching all of these emotions.
It seems wise to lean into what is. This is the potential reality with any decision I make here ...
Some people are going to be understanding, and will be supportive.
Some people are going to be upset, and emote correspondingly.
Some people are going to be critical, both charitably and uncharitably.
Some people are going to get triggered by me, for their own shadowy reasons.
Some people are going to be untethered from reality, and try to involve me in their story.
Related to the latter, I am getting weirder messages behind the scenes, and shit is getting pretty bizarre. All of this is becoming jumbled together for me, and I am going to feel all this jumbled together.
In the recent “Keeping a Little Bit to Myself” entry, I received a lot of loving support, and unsolicited advice, which was welcomed. My favorite was this:
Set boundaries.
Yes. Everything is a reframe away from seeing it as an opportunity, and all of this is an opportunity. Sure, this is the first time I have experienced this much energy come towards me, from people I do not know, and I will need to set boundaries. This is akin to putting on my oxygen mask first.
I am not a celebrity and I do not want to be one, but with the little glimpses I am experiencing here—with gaining more stature in the eyes of others—I see why celebrities have to create boundaries.
I also want to do my due-diligence of not becoming reactionary when people are emotionally upset, or a few bad apples become uncharitable. This is why I am journaling, with unpolished thoughts. It slows down my mind, and helps me reason things through.
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