The problem with modern society is everyone wants to be useful.
To be useful means you are put to use toward doing something. However, one can be put to use toward something that is not good. Put another way: one can be foolishly useful.
People are terrified of not being useful. With unexamined fear driving them, they rush to prove their usefulness. Why? Because they fear being useless, and think being useless means being socially discarded. Nobody wants to be socially discarded.
A mistaken premise lurks within people, conflating not being of current use with being useless. Not being of current use simply means one is not being contextually useful toward a specific objective, which may or may not be wise. Being useless implies a permanent state of having no use, which explains why feelings of being socially discarded often follow closely.
It is wise to untether this premise: just because one is not currently of use does not mean they will forever be of no use. Rather, not being of current use could imply any of the following:
It is wise to discover how to be useful in the current environment.
It is wise to change oneself to be useful in the current environment.
It is wise to change environments to be useful in another one.
It is wise not to be of use at all, to relax, and enjoy the current environment as is.
One need not be useful all the time. In fact, it is dangerous to try. If someone always feels the urge to be useful, there's a chance that toxic shame is the motivator. In such cases, it is best to have the courage to feel fully useless so that greater discernment can emerge regarding how one can be put to use—or not—less foolishly.
In my philosophy practice, a recurring theme is the sense of shame that arises from feeling pressured and subsequently failing to be useful in what one ultimately perceives as meaningless. This diversion hinders the discovery of one's true calling. The relational spaciousness provided by philosophical inquiry allows for a deeper understanding of oneself. It enables others to truly see you, understanding your mind and feeling what is happening in your body, guiding toward the good, the true, and the beautiful.
If you'd like to inquire with me, I still engage in inquiries on weekends and have some availability for June and July. I am also open to alternative slots if scheduling permits. You can schedule us here.