Love Reinvented
Tomorrow’s events:
Stoic Breath w/ Steve Beattie. Every Wednesday @ 7:00 AM ET. RSVP here.
Broadcasting in the Sensemaking Web: An Un-Masterclass w/ David Fuller. December 9th, 16th, 23rd, and 30th. 12:00 PM ET. RSVP here. 75 mins.
Social Design Club w/ Freyja and Joe Edelman. Every Wednesday @ 1:30 PM ET. RSVP here. Join the club here. 90 mins.
Polyamory vs Monogamy: A Discussion w/ Janet Bennion. December 23rd @ 4:00 PM ET. RSVP here.
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December 22nd, 2020
Love…no such thing.
Whatever it is that binds families and married couples together, that's not love. That's stupidity or selfishness or fear. Love doesn't exist.
Self interest exists, attachment based on personal gain exists, complacency exists. But not love. Love has to be reinvented, that’s certain.
Arthur Rimbaud wrote that. I always loved that “love has to be reinvented” line, and the curiosity it invokes in me. I also loved how curious his life was. I have not read much of him, nor do I know much about him, but I know he said “fuck this” and abruptly stopped writing and started doing something else.
I became an “internet person” by going on Twitter on May 2017, and I was probably doing lame tweets to make myself feel smart, and then I co-wrote this viral memetic tribes white paper, which got shared by the likes of Jordan Peterson, Venkatesh Rao, Alexander Bard, and others. I went on a podcast tour, started my own podcast, and then COVID came, and then The Stoa happened.
I do not want to be an internet person anymore though, and I am ready to delete all of my social media accounts. I am ready to pull a Rimbaud, with my beautiful wife, and our crazy cat Socrates. That small-town living is calling us, and this sand mandala move is feeling more right day by day.
Love still needs to be reinvented, and I sense that reinvention has to do with communitas. I am probably not the man for that job. The daemon works in mysterious ways, and maybe my role with The Stoa was to simply foreshadow, and be a temporary beacon, for what wants to come. I feel like I can breathe again now, and excitement is returning.
Somebody wrote a “love letter to the steward,” and here is a sweet passage from it …
I want to dance with The Stoa until it’s gone, then I’ll find a new dancing partner. But no one likes to hear “you know, I won’t dance with you forever” whispered in their ear in between every single song. Life’s too short to dance in horror. I wish to express my love, gratitude, and respect for your great efforts and the many beautiful experiences you have created and facilitated, Peter! I hope and trust you will navigate these waters skillfully.
There will be no whispers from me, my friend.
For the next three months, let us dance slowly, and lovingly, while appreciating what was, and what could have been, with a hint of what still could be. The Magnetic Fields song “Nothing Matters When We’re Dancing” feels right to play right now, and rest into, because I want to dance like nothing matters, in homage to a love that needs reinventing ...
And nothing matters when we're dancing
In tat or tatters you're entrancing
Be we in Paris or in Lansing
Nothing matters when we're dancing
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