"No."
This feels good to say. Let me practice:
Hang out with me.
"No."
Respond to my email.
"No."
Listen to my criticism.
"No."
Believe in my theory of everything.
"No."
Care about my cause.
"No."
Be the person I want you to be.
"No."
Be moved by my shaming of you.
"No."
Get swayed by my subtle emotional manipulation.
"No."
This feels so good to say. In the classic book on assertiveness, When I Say No, I Feel Guilty, Manuel Smith recommended the "broken record" technique. This is simply repeating your refusal every time you are met with pressure. No, no, no. You do not necessarily have to say the word. You can announce it with your body or allow the spirit to express it for you.
You are busy. You are on a mission. You have things to accomplish. You do not have time for distractive bullshit. Make your no impenetrable, unshakable, hot to the touch. Have your soul say no to everything that gets in the way of you becoming whole.
You must say a resounding no to most things to say a full-bodied yes to the most important things.
On the other side of the paywall, there will be Zoom links to the Collective Journalling session every weekday at 8 AM ET and to the Collective Inquiry session on Monday at 6 PM ET about the “alivelihood question.”
Collective Journalling is a communal practice that started in May 2021 during Rebel Wisdom’s Becoming a Live Player course, continued to live on at The Stoa, and will now live with Less Foolish. The sessions happen via Zoom and are 90 mins, with check-ins in chat at the beginning and an opportunity to connect with fellow journalers in breakout rooms at the end. The session concludes with sharing a passage in the chat. Most of the time is spent in silence together, individually inquiring about what matters most. A beautiful group of people has formed around this practice.
Collective Inquiry is a communal practice that emerged out of my philosophy practice. The inquiries in my practice were often beautiful and surprise-filled, leading to insights for my inquiry partner and me. I want to make these inquiries have a collective essence so many can enjoy them. I have tried different group inquiry practices, with therapeutic or spiritual framings, but I am left dissatisfied with what I have experienced. I want us to create something new and experiment with different ways to “live the questions” together.
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Less Foolish to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.